The Horror Show
Red Christmas
by Craig Anderson
Christmas has never really been my favorite holiday, I am more of a Halloween type of girl. I have seen my share of alternative Christmas movies, Gremlins, Black Christmas, Silent Night Deadly Night, Die Hard. It's been a minute since we've got a good Christmas horror that didn't center around Krampus. Luckily, we got a special present called Red Christmas wrapped up with a bow straight from Australia.
The movie opens with the bombing of an abortion clinic by a religious zealot. In all the confusion he finds a fetus that has survived. He takes the survived abortion and names him Cletus. Let's let that sink in. Cletus the fetus. He raises Cletus the fetus like any crazy fundamentalist would, with a healthy dose of Jesus, abuse, and fear for twenty years. Cletus loses his adopted father in, what I assume, was another bombing. Cletus is now left with a letter, a necklace, his little red suitcase, and a desire to find the mother that got rid of him so long ago.
We cut to a happy, yet dysfunctional family. Diane, played by the ultimate every mom, Dee Wallace, gathers her family together to have an old fashion American Christmas in Australia. After her husband died she wanted to do something wonderful for her family even though they don't seem to be as into it as she is. The two older sisters fight constantly, the younger sister is a stereotypical millennial, Uncle Joe is puffin' on his medicinal, and the only one feeling the spirit is her son Jerry, who has Down's Syndrome and spouts Shakespeare. He's my favorite.
The festivities are interrupted by a knock on the door. It's Cletus the fetus, who looks and sounds very much like Joseph Merrick, The Elephant Man, all shrouded in a cloak and mask, asking to please come in. Diane is full of Christmas goodwill and she invites the strange man in, gives him a cup of tea, and a present… because Christmas. He begins to read the letter and exposes Diane's twenty-year-old secret, Cletus the fetus is her aborted son. When she rejects him a second time and kicks him out, Cletus the Fetus decides it's no more mister nice abortion, time to spread the holiday fear!
Red Christmas is probably one of the better Christmas horror movies. It's not as good as Black Christmas, but it's not Initiation: Silent Night Deadly Night 4, either. The story was interesting and Dee Wallace is always a treat. Cletus the Fetus was creepy and yet you felt for him. He was just trying to find the family he never had. The other characters were forgettable. They didn't help the plot. They were just there for kill fodder, with the exception of Uncle Joe and Jerry. They were just delightful.
The kills were pretty cool and kind of over the top, but in a good way. Cletus the Fetus is a great masked killer. I wish they wouldn't have unmasked him at the end, but it kind of felt like a nod to another deformed mama's boy from Camp Crystal Lake.
Like I said, Christmas really isn't my thing, but I still like to celebrate in my own way. When it comes time for my annual movie marathon on December twenty-fifth, you better believe that Red Christmas will be going on my nice list. Happy Holidays!
Robin Thompson, HMS
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